
Has your drinking made your life unmanageable?
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Maybe you've tried to get sober before and it didn't last?
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Maybe you've tried moderating your drinking but now you are drinking more than ever?
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Maybe you are doing things you swore you would never do?
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Maybe you're fighting with your partner or your family, b/c once again you didn't follow through or didn't show up?
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Maybe your struggling at your job where you've always been able to keep it together before?
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Maybe you are newly sober or recently started moderating your drinking and you don't see how you can possibly do this for the rest of your life?
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Some people will be able to moderate and move on. Many of us try that and find out, the hard way, (by nearly killing ourselves, or at the very least, our lives getting worse) the only way is full sobriety. And by the way, you don't have to stay sober "for the rest of your life." You don't have to drink today. That's it. You may think "it's impossible, everyone drinks, how would I socialize with my friends and colleagues without alcohol? No one does that." I promise you, you can. You can even do it and have fun. Maybe not right away. But it is completely possible.
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I've been there and am sober, myself, for many years, one day at a time. At some points it has been one hour at a time. I have a lot of fun in my life. You can too. You may not believe it. If you don't, can you believe, that I believe, you can? Cause I do.
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There is not one way to get and stay sober. I will tell you that its very individualized. Some options will work for some and some will not. I can help you sort through what would be best for you and meet with you for therapy as you find your way through. There will be no judgement on my end regarding whatever path you take at any given point. I don't fire you if you fall off. I don't fire you if you aren't ready for complete sobriety and still want to try to moderate your drinking. I am here to coach you, help you sort through your deeper shit, and keep it moving.
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The therapy piece is to help you clear out the underlying issues which lead you to drink to begin with. You didn't become an alcoholic or a heavy drinker out of nowhere. Concurrently with therapy, some people join12-Step Programs (e.g., Alcoholics Anonymous - AA, Narcotics Anonymous - NA, etc.), Smart Recovery, Moderation Management, etc.
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Are you obsessed with someone else's drinking or feelings? You might be codependent.
Codependency is a pattern in a relationship where you base your emotions and feelings on someone else way too much. If the other person (usually a partner, parent, or child) is in a bad mood, you are in a bad mood. If they are happy, you are happy. If they wake up irritable, you have a bad day. You consistently prioritize the other person's needs over your own, often to the point of your own lack of self-care and unmanageability in your life. Sound familiar?
Codependency often stems from learned dysfunctional family dynamics, unhealthy patterns in communication or emotional expression.
Common traits of codependent people often include:
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A strong fear of abandonment
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Difficulty setting boundaries
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An intense desire for approval
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Enabling destructive behaviors of others
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Neglecting personal needs
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A persistent need to control others (yes, you are actually trying to control everything and everyone).
Therapy can help you break this cycle. We will work on:
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Communication
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Boundaries
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Subconscious patterns keeping you stuck here
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Self care (real self-care beyond bubble baths, which includes setting boundaries, by the way. This will not be comfortable, but it will be life changing)
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